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NEVERENDING ♾️ The NEVERENDING Raising Children Thread

Tomorrow evening the vet will come to help my beloved kitty boy over the Rainbow Bridge. We haven't told Itty Bitty yet. She will be heartbroken.

My parents' kitty was put to sleep about a month ago and Itty Bitty is still sad about that. Tomorrow is going to be hard for so many reasons.
Bella was very sad when Captain crossed the rainbow bridge. She still talks about it 6 years later. His picture is included on the annual Dia de los Muertos ofrenda. I don't really have any advice about what to do with your doggo that is being fostered by another family. If he has his paperwork and can be brought over, I'd be inclined to bring him over especially if your German stay will not be coming to an end anytime soon.
 
So twice now Junior has punched holes in drywall while having a rage fit. I'm going to appoint him the task of fixing both holes. Need to find easy instructions for him to do drywall repairs. I suspect he'll enjoy it. I just want to make sure he does a good job.
I suggest the "California patch" method. You can buy a 2' x 2' square of drywall at the big box square for a few dollars. My little person is Destructo 2000 (accidental) so I've had to do this twice in the past year.

 
So twice now Junior has punched holes in drywall while having a rage fit. I'm going to appoint him the task of fixing both holes. Need to find easy instructions for him to do drywall repairs. I suspect he'll enjoy it. I just want to make sure he does a good job.
Sounds like Junior needs an outlet to channel his fits of range.
 
I suggest the "California patch" method. You can buy a 2' x 2' square of drywall at the big box square for a few dollars. My little person is Destructo 2000 (accidental) so I've had to do this twice in the past year.

Oddly enough, that was the very video I just watched during lunch. He punched the ceiling over the staircase, so it's a slanted section of ceiling drywall about 16" x 16" that needs to be replaced.
 
I took my youngest to school this morning and as she's standing in line on the blacktop waiting to go in with the rest of the kindergartners, she turns and yells to me in the loudest voice possible, "Dad! My underpants are sliding down! Dad! Fix my underpants!"

Kids make me laugh.
 
True ?
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My son, who is on the autism spectrum, occasionally will start telling me about what his nimble mind has recently uncovered and found interesting. I usually enjoy these moments with him, but Sunday morning I had other things on my mind and didn't really want to hear about rabies, in depth, ad nauseum. I turned to him and told him I wasn't really into it right then. He cut me to the quick: "Dad, transferring knowledge is one way autistic people express affection". Yeah, it was a gut punch.
 
My son, who is on the autism spectrum, occasionally will start telling me about what his nimble mind has recently uncovered and found interesting. I usually enjoy these moments with him, but Sunday morning I had other things on my mind and didn't really want to hear about rabies, in depth, ad nauseum. I turned to him and told him I wasn't really into it right then. He cut me to the quick: "Dad, transferring knowledge is one way autistic people express affection". Yeah, it was a gut punch.
Yep. I hear ya.

[/accessing my zen mental state when my son and I enter the large steam engine shed at the IL Railway Museum]

Though it's good I actually sincerely enjoy much of this stuff. :)
 
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I have recently introduced my 13 year old to:

Robo Cop (1987)

The Rock (1996)


Die Hard with a Vengeance (1995)

He loved them all. Now I have to dig up Con Air and Starship Troopers.
 
I have recently introduced my 13 year old to:

Robo Cop (1987)

The Rock (1996)


Die Hard with a Vengeance (1995)

He loved them all. Now I have to dig up Con Air and Starship Troopers.

I noticed Starship Troopers just came back to Hulu recently. I can imagine which scene will be a favorite for your 13-year-old! ;)

FWIW, I read the book last fall and then re-watched the movie. If you can get past the cheesy special effects, it holds up pretty well. But, let's be honest, those special effects were really part of the charm and sort of a signature for Paul Verhoeven action movies of the time. If your kid liked RoboCop and ends up liking Starship Troopers, definitely hit up Total Recall. My wife and I watched that one last fall too (I don't think she had ever seen it before) and I think that one might be my favorite of those three, at least in terms of actual plot; I think Starship Troopers is the most fun of the three.
 
I noticed Starship Troopers just came back to Hulu recently. I can imagine which scene will be a favorite for your 13-year-old! ;)

FWIW, I read the book last fall and then re-watched the movie. If you can get past the cheesy special effects, it holds up pretty well. But, let's be honest, those special effects were really part of the charm and sort of a signature for Paul Verhoeven action movies of the time. If your kid liked RoboCop and ends up liking Starship Troopers, definitely hit up Total Recall. My wife and I watched that one last fall too (I don't think she had ever seen it before) and I think that one might be my favorite of those three, at least in terms of actual plot; I think Starship Troopers is the most fun of the three.
Total Recall (1990) is a good suggestion.

Starship Troopers is on Netflix too, so we'll likely be hitting these up soon.

We also have The Great Escape (1963) in the queue too as I think he'll enjoy the setting, scheming and escape action. My son is a bit of a natural born schemer, so we need to feed it appropriately. ;)
 
@mendelman - If he likes escape movies and scheming and stuff like that, since Con Air is already on your watch list, don't forget the other Nicolas Cage classic from that era: The Rock.

You can totally bypass Face/Off though. I tried re-watching that one not too long ago and my god it was awful!
 
@mendelman - If he likes escape movies and scheming and stuff like that, since Con Air is already on your watch list, don't forget the other Nicolas Cage classic from that era: The Rock.

You can totally bypass Face/Off though. I tried re-watching that one not too long ago and my god it was awful!
I already mentioned The Rock in my post you quoted.

C'mon old man...keep up. ;)

He loved that movie with 100% genuine sincerity, which we all know is quite a feat for a 13 yr old boy to muster.
 
I already mentioned The Rock in my post you quoted.

C'mon old man...keep up. ;)

He loved that movie with 100% genuine sincerity, which we all know is quite a feat for a 13 yr old boy to muster.

I don't know how I missed that. I must have been all caught up in my love of Starship Troopers and the mention of Con Air.


My oldest and I recently finished our trek through (most of) the MCU movies in chronological order. Her favorites were Guardians of the Galaxy, Thor: Ragnarok, Captain Marvel, and any scene with Hulk. She also really liked the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies, especially Homecoming (though we haven't seen the newest one yet).

After we made it through the original set of movies we moved on to Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings and The Eternals (is this "Phase 2"?). We both really liked Shang-Chi... but The Eternals was pretty horrible. Last night we started the Hawkeye TV show. We only had time for about half of the 1st episode, but so far we enjoyed it, but that may have been because all we can remember is the cheesy, but funny, Avengers musical that he was sitting through with his kids.
 
I don't know how I missed that. I must have been all caught up in my love of Starship Troopers and the mention of Con Air.


My oldest and I recently finished our trek through (most of) the MCU movies in chronological order. Her favorites were Guardians of the Galaxy, Thor: Ragnarok, Captain Marvel, and any scene with Hulk. She also really liked the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies, especially Homecoming (though we haven't seen the newest one yet).

After we made it through the original set of movies we moved on to Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings and The Eternals (is this "Phase 2"?). We both really liked Shang-Chi... but The Eternals was pretty horrible. Last night we started the Hawkeye TV show. We only had time for about half of the 1st episode, but so far we enjoyed it, but that may have been because all we can remember is the cheesy, but funny, Avengers musical that he was sitting through with his kids.
GotG and T:Rag are, imo, the two most rewatchable MCU movies in terms of just fun adventures. I believe Gunn and Waititi are excellent creators/directors to get the correct tone for MCU movies. I can also watch CA:FA, The Avengers, and CA:WS on repeat as well, as I think they also get it right too.

Chang-Chi left me thinking So...why should I care and The Eternals was too self serious and completely missed the mark in regards to the 'correct' MCU tone, but the end credits tag scene gives me hope they find the 'right' tone in subsequent outings with these characters. Kind of like the progressively better evolution of Hemsworth's Thor from Thor to Thor:Rag to InfWar/Endgame. (man was vengeful-then-fat Thor just the best combo of pain and levity all at once?)
 
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I have recently introduced my 13 year old to:

Robo Cop (1987)

The Rock (1996)


Die Hard with a Vengeance (1995)

He loved them all. Now I have to dig up Con Air and Starship Troopers.
I haven't seen any of those. Not one.

Wait... maybe Robo Cop..... but didn't particularly like it.
 
To quote my 14 yr old son (almost 15), I love the triangle wizardry of trigonometry, but I don't like pi.
 
I realized today that we haven’t been going to band concerts & sports awards banquets & class meetings this year.

After all the years (& heavily in HS) I haven’t missed it to some degree, but I really do.
 
I recently helped my eldest move to a studio apt in Chicago. One of the cheapest in that area. She got the keys and the locks were jammed. 2 hours later the leasing company had to get a locksmith to open it up for her and my jaw hit the ground :eek: at what I saw.

The walls had not been painted for decades, the bathroom was old school decrepit, the oak floors were scuffed and scratched. The back entrance looked like it belonged to a crack house with voodoo looking shit on the landing from previous tenant. It was a paralyzing situation. How on earth could I help her mover her stuff into that room? I needed a moment or two or three or ten. We did the deed got it done.

Bright side, windows were new and had screens, her previous garden apt was dark so let there be light yay! Newish ceiling fan albeit with blinking party lights. Updated kitchen cupboards but greasy. GD them how could they rent an apt never mind she saw it in person and agreed to rent it but thought they’d clean it first. We hit Target for essentials and I calmed down a bit.
FF two weeks later she texts me from a cafe’ says painters are in the apt and next they’re replacing drywall and bathroom fixtures adding outlets and a bathroom vanity. For real? I get pics and a movie. I am impressed, it looks good! Clean, shiny, operational, and all in working order. Now the I’m thinking what a steal! It’s a new strategy find the worst apt for rent in a good area negotiate rent and have the maintenance dept bring it up to date after you move in?

She has an alley view not so bad with shade trees across the way. Garbage trucks though all day every day it seems and the train 1/2 block away. So noises of the city. But right now all she wants is for the building to turn off the heat! Still can’t quite believe my soft spoken gentle woman is living in a big sometimes scary city!
 
That’s crazy @Jen but I’m happy it seems to have worked out well. My kids don’t know it yet, but having a dad that was the fair housing officer for years will pay benefits when it comes time to rent.:cool:
 
It sure will!

Her garden apt flooded twice through the front door and backing up in tub after monsoon rains. Reason being the sump pump stopped working ( so that’s why there’s a drain grate in the concrete landing) and no one in leasing office but the secretive maintenance dude knew about its existence.



Back at Apt 1X. Yes 1X 🤨Apparently the previous tenant had lived there a very long time and didn’t want to move. He kept his tools, ladders etc inside the apartment, he had an unauthorized roomie ( lease violation) and refused to let maintenance inside ever.

They left through the window using a ladder after messing with the locks. So it was an ugly looking apt but not trashed or defiled at least. I was surprised they left the curtain rods up.

All sunshine and rainbows now 🥰

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@Jen - Sounds like things worked out in the end for your daughter. Did maintenance re-stain or wax the floors? They definitely look a little rough in the photo, but they still look pretty good.

Regarding garbage trucks: Many moons ago, I stayed in a flat in the Lake View neighborhood for a few weeks and it definitely seemed like there were garbage trucks coming all day everyday. I imagine it sounds like this in every really dense setting.
 
My daughter, after maintenance was done, was feeling burned out from the stress of the move and ended up hiring a cleaning outfit to degrease the cupboards, wash baseboards, the fridge, stove, radiator and they swabbed the floor. They organized some of her stuff and even shined up her small appliances. So no the floor is original condition but yeah rough but solid.

Talking about garbage one day we wanted to find out where it all goes. It gets hauled to transfer stations in the city where it is dumped. Then it gets scooped up and reloaded on trucks that take it 200 miles to landfills near Joliet and in Indiana. I kind assumed they’d incinerate it, but recycling and green waste pickup is available as well for a fee.
 
A few days ago I started reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory to my kindergartner. We're only a few chapters in but she's been really in to it so far. Last night I got to the chapter where Charlie found his Golden Ticket and she was so excited I truly thought she was going to hyperventilate and then she was jumping up and down on the bed in genuine happiness and she started crying a little and she told me it was because she was so happy for him.

Her joy at that scene in the book was one of the sweetest things I can remember experiencing as a parent.
 
When your children reach majority age do they become your peers?

Both mine (29 and 32) think they are my peers, and I try my best to grant them cred.
 
Just remember to treat them nice since they are the ones who are taking care of you in a few years, but we all know who's boss.
 
When your children reach majority age do they become your peers?

Both mine (29 and 32) think they are my peers, and I try my best to grant them cred.
I have a 28 year old. She's good people. I'm still her mom. She's friends with many of my friends though :)
 
When your children reach majority age do they become your peers?

Both mine (29 and 32) think they are my peers, and I try my best to grant them cred.
I have a 28 year old. She's good people. I'm still her mom. She's friends with many of my friends though :)
Mine are only 12, 13, 14 right now, but depending on their 'maturity' in their late 20s-early 30s, I may grant them the credentials.

I easily gained this status at 24 when I got my Masters, got married, moved to The Big City and started my first professional job.
 
I realized today that we haven’t been going to band concerts & sports awards banquets & class meetings this year.

After all the years (& heavily in HS) I haven’t missed it to some degree, but I really do.
My wife being a teacher, we still get a little bit of that. At her old school we would go to the Military Ball of the JROTC because it was the biggest extracurricular activity at that school and a lot of her students were in it. And by supporting JROTC, she had the commandant in her back pocket to help her with any discipline problems with JROTC kids.

At her new school it's not so much JROTC but sports.... unfortunately there are lots of different sports so she has to go to a game or two every year to keep her in good graces with the coaches and the kids. (Most teaches don't bother so the fact that she makes the effort carries a lot of weight.)
 
Dad life

Picking up a fan magazine of your daughter's favorite Korean boy band and having to explain it's for your daughter.
I always pretended I loved this stuff so the cashier just looks at you funny.

Right now I'm hoping the oldest passes her geometry class.
 
This morning's conversation about 10:00 am

Dad, my tuition is due tomorrow for that summer class.

Okay, thanks for the warning.

I told it was coming.

How much?

$XXX

It'll be in your account about lunch. You can take care of it.

Can you send it in?

Nope, I don't have that info. You can take care of it.

Alright. Thanks.
 
This morning's conversation about 10:00 am

Dad, my tuition is due tomorrow for that summer class.

Okay, thanks for the warning.

I told it was coming.

How much?

$XXX

It'll be in your account about lunch. You can take care of it.

Can you send it in?

Nope, I don't have that info. You can take care of it.

Alright. Thanks.
Welcome to adulting kiddo!
 
This morning's conversation about 10:00 am

Dad, my tuition is due tomorrow for that summer class.

Okay, thanks for the warning.

I told it was coming.

How much?

$XXX

It'll be in your account about lunch. You can take care of it.

Can you send it in?

Nope, I don't have that info. You can take care of it.

Alright. Thanks.
One of those I love you dearly but...... moments.
 
We’re good friends with our mechanic who owns the European car repair shop. He’ll work on most anything though. My youngest has a bright yellow 2000 VW bug. It’s full of her crap and covered in various stickers. He works on it mostly as a favor because imo seeing it parked next to pristine Porsches and the like does his business no favors. Lol. So recently she reminded her Dad hey when are you going to schedule my oil change? It’s like 5 k over. Wut?! I said find a quick oil change place, and if your car dies you know how much a used car costs these days?

Radio silence. Subject was dropped. I brought it up the other day and asked how’s the car running? Fine. It rattles though. Ok. Ever get the oil changed? Big sigh, yes I did.

Such a minor task but a huge hurdle. I kinda get it, I remember as a young adult feeling so out of place at the local garage asking for repairs. Talking to the greased up mechanics and feeling puny. I ended up buying the fix it manual ( Haynes?) just to troubleshoot and learn some lingo. It helped build up my automobile confidence.
 
We’re good friends with our mechanic who owns the European car repair shop. He’ll work on most anything though. My youngest has a bright yellow 2000 VW bug. It’s full of her crap and covered in various stickers. He works on it mostly as a favor because imo seeing it parked next to pristine Porsches and the like does his business no favors. Lol. So recently she reminded her Dad hey when are you going to schedule my oil change? It’s like 5 k over. Wut?! I said find a quick oil change place, and if your car dies you know how much a used car costs these days?

Radio silence. Subject was dropped. I brought it up the other day and asked how’s the car running? Fine. It rattles though. Ok. Ever get the oil changed? Big sigh, yes I did.

Such a minor task but a huge hurdle. I kinda get it, I remember as a young adult feeling so out of place at the local garage asking for repairs. Talking to the greased up mechanics and feeling puny. I ended up buying the fix it manual ( Haynes?) just to troubleshoot and learn some lingo. It helped build up my automobile confidence.
I owned a '72 VW Beetle that I gave $1000 for in 1977. We called the car Moby. Four speed manual, taught myself how to drive it, and probably put two dozen friends behind the wheel of a manual for the first time in their lives in that car. I put a bumper sticker on it that read "I support the right to arm bears" and promptly had a minor wreck with a John Birch member of the faculty at my college. Good times.

Fortunately, I lived around the corner from a VW specialty repair place run by two Irish brothers (straight off the boat, accent and all). While I didn't speak mechanic, they didn't need me to - it was a Beetle after all. But they were so kind and eager to fix bugs that I was never later intimated in a garage shop.
 
Oldest moves into an apartment for college at the end of July. We're trying to work on adulting lessons for the next two months. Should have worked at it harder, but she fought it for a long time. She spends week on/week off with us and her dad's family always just did everything for her. So far we've gotten laundry, basic banking, basic car maintenance, scheduling doctors appointments, groceries, and home maintenance for apartment living (flipping breakers, changing light bulbs, clogged toilets). She's in charge of 2 meals a week for the next couple of months, taking a self defense course, and working on budgeting.

At some point, we're going to have to have a conversation about not putting yourself in bad situations, what to do if you get in a bad situation, and alcohol; but her mom and dad are not very keen on bringing up those topics. (Neither of them had traditional college experiences or went to schools that had "party school" reputations.)
 
This evening is the final middle school band concert for the year. I'm looking forward to it a lot more than I thought I would. I'm glad we still have two more years of them for 7th and 8th grades and hoping that our daughter decides to also join jazz band next year so she gets a few more performance opportunities.
 
At some point, we're going to have to have a conversation about not putting yourself in bad situations, what to do if you get in a bad situation, and alcohol; but her mom and dad are not very keen on bringing up those topics. (Neither of them had traditional college experiences or went to schools that had "party school" reputations.)
I went away to college 300 miles from home. It was an engineering school with a very hard-drinking reputation. Luckily I grew up in Buffalo. I'd seen enough people pathetically drunk and then hung over (including my older brother) that even though I over-did it a few times (looking at you, Jack Daniels), I never got absolutely wrecked. To be honest I drank very rarely in high school but when fraternity rush started I dove in.

And I have to say the fraternity scene was an excellent environment to learn how to drink. If your mates from the freshman dorm didn't make sure you got home safe, brothers at most of the fraternities would make sure you got back okay, and if you were really wrecked they'd usually alert the RA so they could keep an eye on you (it came with the territory). One of the guys from our floor had too much at a semi-formal party and ended up sleeping it off on the bathroom floor in a pool of his own vomit. Eventually the RA and a few of us freshmen got him out of his suit, cleaned it and him up as best we could, pumped several cups of coffee into him, then turned him in to the care of his roommate.

Of course I was a guy, it's a little different for the girls.
 
The Girl is a counselor at a sleep-away camp for girls this summer. It's her 3 (& last) year as a counselor & it's the same camp she's been going to since she was 6.

This weekend, she got certified for swift-water rescue (she has other certifications too). Last night @ the first day of counselor orientation, they told her she was Head of the Waterfront which means she's responsible for all water related activities this summer. She's very excited (plus there's a $ bonus).
 
Congratulations to her!
My girls went to an all girls sleep away camp too! In Newaygo Mi. Later one became a counselor and then was promoted to “Tripping Director”. In charge of all the off campus trips going hither and yon.

They both go back for the alumni reunions and some special events.

My spouse was wrangled into volunteering there as a van driver taking campers to hiking trails and ferry docks. He didn’t mind at all but the commute to camp was a bit of a drag. Then last year they offered him a paid summer job that includes room and board( a private room in their air conditioned health lodge) He goes up and stays M-F helps to open camp, set up the platform tents, put in the docks, fix and repair stuff. When camp opens he’ll be driving the vans and get this, he has to drive the ski boat too! 🚤 so he reports to both the Tripping Director and Head of Waterfront. Yep one summer he reported to his daughter for duty.

I otoh pitch in $$ for their fundraising campaigns and call it good. 😝
 
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