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what's a loser?

luckless pedestrian

luckless pedestrian

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You know the person who kisses up, has to take control of everything and drives everyone nuts, the person you don't want to sit next to at the function, blah blah - but what if that person is the one promoted, never seems to get in trouble for stuff the person wrongfully did, gets a raise even, etc.

is this person a loser?

what if somoene you see as a loser maybe really isn't?

what's your definition?
 
My definition is pretty simple. A loser is someone who has no drive in life, no desire/ambition to make the world around them better, and typically feels that they are entitled to things simply because they exist. They generally coast through life, make little effort, and frequently suck up enormous amounts of time and energy from those around them. They are also the people who are the first to complain and the last to suggest ways to improve things in a meaningful and intelligent manner.
 
Someone who doesn't want to win. Whether it be a life, sports, or difficult situations.
 
luckless pedestrian said:
but what if that's just depression?
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I think that is a toughy, but most people I know with depression want to win... they just can't. Or they don't feel like it that day. You are not a loser if you have a chemical imbalance... at least I don't think so... :)
 
I'd say a loser is someone who is unmotivated and often gives up before they try.

I'm hesitant to use that label though since I recognize there are many people who are outwardly like that but in reality are nothing of the sort. I mean I can resemble my own definition if someone doesn't understand what makes me tick. Despite appearing unmotivated, I've so far accomplished everything I've set out to do. It's just I choose to remain somewhat guarded about my ambitions since they so far haven't involved staying where I'm at.

I remember a coworker telling me I had no motivations after having just graduated with a masters at age 24. It's just kind of awkward to say my plans don't involve working here.
 
btrage said:
I believe the answer is Beck.
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luckless pedestrian said:
phew thanks - I needed a comic relief pondering the meaning of life this week...
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I try. ;)

This happens at my wife's work place. People who should be fired somehow stick around and get more responsibilities. Often they are "protected" by others within the organization because of friendship. If it happens at her work it must happen a lot of places. The tough part is that her company could do so much better if these people went away. Are these people "losers"? In regards to how they perform their job, yes.

It's tough for her to deal with. But I truly believe in karma, even though the good karma sometimes takes a long time to come back our way.
 
btrage said:
I try. ;)

This happens at my wife's work place. People who should be fired somehow stick around and get more responsibilities. Often they are "protected" by others within the organization because of friendship. If it happens at her work it must happen a lot of places. The tough part is that her company could do so much better if these people went away. Are these people "losers"? In regards to how they perform their job, yes.

It's tough for her to deal with. But I truly believe in karma, even though the good karma sometimes takes a long time to come back our way.
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That's been the case everywhere I have ever worked and pretty much everywhere my wife has ever worked as well. Is it actually not the case at some places of employment?

On a slightly different note, I think we should be careful about ascribing loserdom to people with no apparent ambitions. Some people are plenty happy to live a simple life making ends meet and being happy. Not everyone wants to stress out trying to be a manager or a rich person.
 
Dan said:
Nope. That person is an asshole.

Defining a "loser" is like describing the difference between a nerd, geek and dweeb. There's actually good losers, those whose loserdom is not self-inflicted, but imposed usually by external forces,.
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I agree with Dan. A perennial underdog can be a "loser". Sometimes I think that having the drive or ambition that makes you always end up on top of the heap does not truly make you a "winner". It just means you're "willing" to do whatever is necessary.

Is Bernie Madoff a "Winner" or a "Loser"? What about before he was caught?
 
It all depends on the context, but I generally classify losers as people who are apathetic about themselves when they know how much better they actually are.


One can lose, but they are lot a loser if they gave it their all.
 
imaplanner said:
That's been the case everywhere I have ever worked and pretty much everywhere my wife has ever worked as well. Is it actually not the case at some places of employment?
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I think some places let it get a whole lot worse than others. The ones that astound me are those people who are so incompetent they're not given any responsibilities while somehow remaining employed.

It reminds me of another definition for loser. A self-righteous know-it-all that's actually accomplished nothing with their lives. I just love when these people give me unsolicited advice about things they know nothing about.
 
imaplanner said:
That's been the case everywhere I have ever worked and pretty much everywhere my wife has ever worked as well. Is it actually not the case at some places of employment?

On a slightly different note, I think we should be careful about ascribing loserdom to people with no apparent ambitions. Some people are plenty happy to live a simple life making ends meet and being happy. Not everyone wants to stress out trying to be a manager or a rich person.
Click to expand...

To me it isn't enough to not be ambitious, but to also expect a great deal in return for one's lack of effort. The simple life seems pretty good to me, though I doubt I could stick with it since I am relatively ambitious and competitive. I wouldn't, however, expect the world to bend over backwards for me. When I think of losers, I more or less picture certain in-laws. They don't want to do any work, want all the gadgets and gizmos that one could possibly own, and are the first people to get nasty when they are inconvenienced in any way. They have really molded my definition of loser.
 
I expect in some people's book I am a 'loser', but in others' am not. That's just how the whole 'eye of the beholder' thing works out.
 
The person LP describes is not a loser. As Dan so eloquently put it, that person is an asshole.

I'm not sure lack of drive or ambition is a good definition for a loser. I know people that lack drive or ambition, but are incredibly happy. I don't like to lump someone in as a loser if their problems are exclusively or mostly the result of external forces beyond his/her control. To me, to be classified as a loser takes a certain amount of apathy toward one's own existence and a failure to utilize one's talents in some produtive way (however you define 'productive') coupled with a sense of entitlement. You can be successful by many measures and still be a loser. By that same token, you can be unsuccessful by those same measures and not be a loser. In my experience, geeks, nerds, dorks, etc. rarely fall into the "loser" definition.
 
I think Bob Seger said it best:

He wants to dream like a young man
With the wisdom of an old man
He wants his home and security
He wants to live like a sailor at sea

Beautiful loser
Where you gonna fall?
When you realize
You just can't have it all

He's your oldest and your best friend
If you need him, he'll be there again
He's always willing to be second-best
A perfect lodger, a perfect guest

Beautiful loser
Read it on the wall
And realize
You just can't have it all
You just can't have it all

You just can't have it all
Ohh, ohh, can't have it all
You can try, you can try, but you can't have it all
Oh yeah

He'll never make any enemies, enemies, no
He won't complain if he's caught in a freeze
He'll always ask, he'll always say please

Beautiful loser
Never take it all
'Cause it's easier
And faster when you fall

You just don't need it all
You just don't need it all
You just don't need it all
Just don't need it all
 
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