I am not sure where to post this, so I will do so right here…
There have been a lot of people talking about the guy who raped an unconscious girl and only got 6 months jail time, and his father is trying to get him out of that. There are people who have been trying to make this a race debate, some have been making it a socioeconomic debate, but there seems to be a lack of people willing to make this about what it is, a debate about personal responsibility.
First and foremost, none of us know the facts of the case, however one thing that I think is universally accepted and understood is what this guy made a very bad decision, and then the judge made a very bad decision by giving him only 6 months in jail. It should have been substantially longer… even if everything was consensual right up until the point where she passed out, which it sounds like it wasn’t from the reports that I have read, 6 months is proof that there is a failure of the justice system.
However, that is only a fraction of the real issue here. He knew better. It does not matter how intoxicated he might have been, if she was passed out, he should have helped her get to a safe place or contacted her friends to help her if he was not able to. Based on the letter written by his dad, I know that he understood right and wrong, but I don’t think he fully understood actions and consequences. From the reports that I have read, he was sheltered and protected all his life which is not a product of income, but a product of bad parenting.
I have seen this with a friend of my oldest son in his Cub Scout den. This young man feels that rules don’t apply to him and that he can do what he wants, when he wants, and his parents will just clean up his mess. Having met his parents and seeing how they interact with him, in their eyes, he is right. They are any ‘better off’ than most people in America, but they are not raising him to be respectful and productive, but instead they are enabling his bad behaviors. As an assistant den leader, there have been several times that we would require the boys clean up after a particular activity and I had to ask his parents not to help out because they were not teaching him responsibility. The other den leader agreed and we found that at a young age, when offered with structure and discipline, he would do great. But he would revert back first chance his parents allowed it. Based on the letter from the father in the rape case, I think this guy was raised the same way. It did not matter what he did, his parents would clean up his mess.
Now don’t get me wrong, as a legal adult, that guy who raped a girl is the individual who is at fault. As I sated before, he knew what he was doing was wrong, and did it anyways. But to call it an issue about race or about income is avoiding the real issue. Too much of our society is raising a generation of children who have never been taught respect and discipline. Not too long ago a young man was shot and killed by police, the first thing his parents said was “this is wrong, he was a good boy.” Granted his prior arrest records and gun found next to him said otherwise. Here is a dad saying the same thing about his son. Different race, different economic profile, but still the same story.
Some people have told me that I am too old school because my sons say “Yes Sir, No Sir, Yes mam, No Mam, they open the door for their mother as well as other people, and the first and most important rule is to treat everyone with respect and honor, including themselves. They know that if they violate these basic rules, that there will be consequences including the loss of freedoms. Personally, as long as society keeps producing people like this guy, I will continue to ignore people who say I am too old school.
