and finally, Doohickie, how's it been so far? Enjoying it?
It's an adjustment. This is our second stint. My sons are 27 and (next week) 24. The older boy was straight As in high school but bonked in college, dropping out after his first year. Having to never work hard, he encountered some harsh realities that year and didn't handle them well. In fact, it took several years of psychologist visits and pharmacological help before his head was screwed on right again. Anyway, a few years ago my wife's sister got him a job in Albany, NY, and he lived up there for about a year while my younger son was away at college for his undergrad. When he moved up to Albany we were at our wit's end with him and were glad to get him out of the house.
Like I said, though, he came back to Fort Worth and was home for a couple years - he got a certification as a pharmacy tech, got a job at Walgreens and has worked there ever since. I didn't feel that urgent need to kick his ass out of the house this time around; he was earning money and it was kind of nice having an adult that could let workmen into the house while my wife and I worked (even though he was working, he's at a 24 hour Walgreens and works various shifts). It was nice also that the dogs had someone home with them a lot of the time.
He bought a brand new car (a Fiesta) last fall to replace the nearly 20-year-old Escort he's been driving. He got his own apartment a few miles away in May. I think he's ready this time. I suspect he will go back to college at this point, but it will be on his dime this time (with maybe just a bit of help from us if he needs it).
The other boy finished his undergrad in music at Texas Wesleyan in December and after a short and unsuccessful (and not very enthusiastic) job search, decided that he would start grad school in the fall. He got accepted at the University of North Texas about 50 miles away, in their masters of library science program (mind you, this is the kid that started out in special ed because he couldn't talk before he turned 4 and had other developmental and learning problems). Funny that he may be the first in the family to earn a masters degree. While the wife and I were on vacation the last two weeks he stayed home and watched the dogs, got his financial aid at UNT laid flat and landed a cashier job at Target to pay for his schooling (and has an interview tomorrow with the UNT music dept. for a gig teaching beginning piano).
So they're both on their way. I couldn't be happier, seeing them get out on their own. My regret is that as the school year spools up (my wife teaches American History at a local high school), the dogs will be home alone during the day and one or the other of us will need to hurry home every night and let them out, feed them, let them out, etc. The older boy is still local and I'm going to encourage him to visit the dogs on the weekdays he has off or works a late shift. He and I don't always see eye to eye and I recognize his need to do his own thing though, so I won't depend on that.
My wife is a little bluesy right now; it's kind of quiet around here. I'm kind of looking forward to her and I getting reacquainted without the boys around (the vacation with just the two of us was a great start). We share a common hobby, cycling, although her idea of cycling is much slower than my typical pace. But we do get out for a "bike date" now and again and explore the city and grab a bite to eat or an ice cream. For myself, I ride with a couple of cycling groups so I've got plenty to distract me. But it'll still be an adjustment for both of us.
