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NEVERENDING ♾️ The NEVERENDING Raising Children Thread

RE: Patience.

Sometime I wonder if I will have patience for children. Using my "current children" as an example I sometimes get mighty frustrated with my dogs at times. I never express this physically... ever... but I sometimes lack the patience that is important in dog/human relationships.

Now, before you fly off the handle in my comparing kids to dogs (I feel that my relationship with my future kids [none planned or expected yet] would be more profound and emotional than with my dogs) I have another example with actual kids:

My neighbors have a 4 year old and a 1 year old. They are really good kids, but like all kids they act out at times. One time when we were having Sunday dinner with everybody in the other nieghbor's driveway Yes, we do this... The 4 year old was being a picky eater and flat out ignoring her dad while wandering around. I could tell she was ignoring her dad on purpose and this got me really annoyed and frustrated and this wasn't even my kid or my responsibility. I kept thinking that I would not tolerate this at all and would probably get angry with the child for doing this.* Later that night, another kid got hurt and was crying really loudly. Now I know that kids do this when hurt (heck, even I cry sometimes when hurt-I'll admit it) but I was just thinking that "Oh man, this sucks to deal with... I never want to do this..."

So is pateince learned, earned or instilled with your own children? I still would like kids eventually, but sometimes I wonder what kind of dad I would be.

*- Maybe I have some issues... who knows?
 
zman,

Having a little 1 yr old of my own and a second in October, I know that I have developed much more patience than I had when I was 20. You have to keep the perspective that they are new people with little experience and don't necessarily know how to express themselves sufficiently or in the correct manner - that's why they need patient parents/guardians. ;) :-D But any individual adult really needs to know whether they can handle the requirements of raising children. I think you have the right introspective nature to come the right conclusion for yourself. And having large breed dogs is definitely a good test.

I actually think raising children will be "easier" than dogs. At least children grow and mature and by 12-13 they have the ability (but maybe not willingness ;)) to reason and learn and become more self-sufficient. Whereas, a pet dog is essentially at the level of a 3 yr old human for it's entire life - need, need, need.
 
Patience is definitely learned. Yesterday we switched day care providers and we got a new one handed to us because we were told our daughter has an "behaviour" issue, and she does. It just took our daycare provider to tell me strait up we need to be better discipline for her. She doesn't look at you when you tell her to do things and pretty much does what she wants. We are on day 2 of tough love with her and already i am seeing improvements (actually sitting down for dinner, bedtime with no playing were one few improvements so far). I am a pretty impatient guy, but my daughter tests my patience day in an day out. I am learning, but it is still tough. I tend to remember this mantra: "Your kids are are a reflection of your parents and how they raised you." Until now i am learning i have some of my father's tendencies such as being controlling and learning to deal with those in order to not have my daughter fall in the same trap. Its tough dude, especially for someone that wasn't ready when it happened, but you know what, i wouldn't trade it for anything, especially after a long day slaving at the office to see your daughter so excited that "Daddy's home" running around in circles and so jubilant just to see your face.
 
I was a rather patient guy before, now I am even more so. Though after a couple of trying events (bickering, refusal to listen, etc) my patience does wear.

It's really not as bad as it seams, especially after being immersed in it for 9 years. However when the kids are away, life is strangely quiet and simple.
 
Raising kids is the most difficult yet rewarding task I have ever done. The challenges are constantly shifting and if you have multiple children they vary with child.

I use to sware that I would never use any of my dads sayings such as 'Just Do it' whenever the why question came up. And for some years I was successful and then we had our second one and at the same time I started my own buisness.........next thing you you know I am my dad..............its wicked!!!

Though all of the toughness of raising kids evaporates whenever they just for no apparent reason run up to you and give you a big hug and a kiss and say that they love you.............turns me to mush.
 
Yeah, I think I can certainly learn some more patience and see how it goes. I have a couple more years before parenthood (if it goes to plan ;)) but have already begun relfecting on my life growing up and things I would change/not change with raising of my own children.

Also having a good friend (a brother to me actually) now being a parent of two boys is a good place to watch. He is great as a dad and handles those two boys (by himself most of the time as his wife works while he goes to school) really well. He and I are due for a talk over a couple beers soon anyways and I may have to pick his brain.
 
zmanPLAN said:
Yeah, I think I can certainly learn some more patience and see how it goes. I have a couple more years before parenthood (if it goes to plan ;)) but have already begun relfecting on my life growing up and things I would change/not change with raising of my own children.

Also having a good friend (a brother to me actually) now being a parent of two boys is a good place to watch. He is great as a dad and handles those two boys (by himself most of the time as his wife works while he goes to school) really well. He and I are due for a talk over a couple beers soon anyways and I may have to pick his brain.
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No matter how much general advice you get, you're still going to raise kids your way. Do what feels right and supportive. Don't react, think first and be prepared to be a goofy kid yourself. I'm really good at telling bad jokes (groaners, not offensive) and the kids love those.. especially puns.

craines said:
Though all of the toughness of raising kids evaporates whenever they just for no apparent reason run up to you and give you a big hug and a kiss and say that they love you.............turns me to mush
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especially when daughters do that.... aww
 
Sunday Dinner in the Driveway?!

Sounds like fun and prime time for wandering toddlers, preoccupied preschoollers and distracted parents trying to turn the conversation away from their kids and back to adult topics. ;)
 
Jen said:
Sunday Dinner in the Driveway?!

Sounds like fun and prime time for wandering toddlers, preoccupied preschoollers and distracted parents trying to turn the conversation away from their kids and back to adult topics. ;)
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[ot]Yeah, typically this is how it occurs. Mostly the kids are either really young or about to get into high school. Recently, the driveway dinners have been held and then an impromptu softball game has formed in the park afterwards until it gets dark. It is fun. Any Cyburbian driving through is welcome to stop over.

We have also held movies in the driveway using a laptop and projector. One movie for kids first, and then another less-kid oriented as the second. [/ot]
 
zman - I never thought I could do it until I had kids - and I can't tell you the number of times I have eaten those words: I will never do that with my kids - :-$

so don't worry about it - when it's your kids, it's different, really it is! :)

I am actually more tolerant of other people's kids than my own because I'm not responsible for them

and 4 year olds? they typically suck - my girls, now 9 and 15 were horrific 4 year olds, just nasty little things but then they turn 5 and it's a sigh of relief, they were angels - my Mom always said that they invented kindergarten so your 4 year old would live to see 5 ;-)

my son is about to turn 4 in September and I'm bracing myself already - :-c
 
luckless pedestrian said:
zman - I never thought I could do it until I had kids - and I can't tell you the number of times I have eaten those words: I will never do that with my kids - :-$
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Ditto that. Its perfectly natural to trying and plot out the way you want things to go, the mistakes you want to avoid, etc. but once they arrive, there is no time for that! You just have to do. Its a very Zen experience, actually - constantly existing in the moment.

And yes, nothing presses my buttons quite like my children can. But these are also moments for personal growth - a chance to say - whoa! I don't think I want to be THAT person again. Scary...

For all the frustration and difficult periods, they are far outweighed by the good.
 
I am my mother in many ways at least when it comes to being a mom. I don't mind though because I think she was a great mom. I think I am a little more culturally aware and certainly travel more than she did and involve my daughter in these activities more than I ever was as a kid. I guess I fall into the non-nonsense category of parent and really don't put up with any kind of poor behavior. She was easy when she's small and we are surviving the teen years without too many issues so far. I know I am not always the most patient person on the planet due to all the demands on my schedule, but we've figure out how to make it work.

Being a parent is the greatest and toughest job I will ever have.
 
Z-Man, patience

I am in year seven on being a parent. Before I became a parent, I did not much care for kids. I wanted to be a parent since I became an adult, but I did not have much interest or patience with kids. Until I became a parent.

The Grand Design works out. When your child is a tiny baby, the little person is so cute and helpless and needy that you can't help but love him or her. As the child gets older, you have time to learn as you go.

Patience comes. If you are lucky enough to have a two-parent family, you have a support person handy. The other parent can take over when your patience is running thin. My wife and I do that.

My son is my shadow. If I am around, he is there with me. This can wear on my patience. But I have developed a deep well of patience. When the well is pumped dry and I am exasperated, my wife usally steps in and takes him for a bit. After a while, my well of patience is plump full and I can go on.

My wife and son left last week to visit her family in Colombia. I am without my family for another three weeks. I thought it would be great. A time to recharge my batteries and be alone for a while.

Really I hate it. I miss my son so much. He does at times try my patience, but the sun rises and sets on that boy, as far as I am concerned. I wish he was around to try my patience to the max. When he gets back, I do not think my well of patience will ever run dry again.
 
Ugh. My kid had colic for 4 months and if you don't develop patience with that, you go to the nuthouse. It was stressful for a couple years, then I had a delightful child up until about age 12 (now 15). Patience nowadays consists of not taking a 2 x 4 to your kid when you discover he's downloaded porn to your computer and sent all your wedding pics to the recycle bin. We'll have a talk tomorrow. :r::-(

You never know when you're ready. I had never even diapered a kid before I had my son at almost-36, but the "parent" thing can click in pretty quick.
 
Being around my niece (10) and nephew (7) for a week was
fun, trying, humbling, stressfull, challenging and other feelings.
 
zmanPLAN said:
Sometime I wonder if I will have patience for children.
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http://www.newsweek.com/id/143792
The most recent comprehensive study on the emotional state of those with kids shows us that the term "bundle of joy" may not be the most accurate way to describe our offspring. "Parents experience lower levels of emotional well-being, less frequent positive emotions and more frequent negative emotions than their childless peers," says Florida State University's Robin Simon, a sociology professor who's conducted several recent parenting studies, the most thorough of which came out in 2005 and looked at data gathered from 13,000 Americans by the National Survey of Families and Households. "In fact, no group of parents—married, single, step or even empty nest—reported significantly greater emotional well-being than people who never had children. It's such a counterintuitive finding because we have these cultural beliefs that children are the key to happiness and a healthy life, and they're not."
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http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art43105.asp
A recent study conducted by the American Sociological Association concluded that parents are more likely to be depressed than their child free counterparts. People without children were deemed happier than any other group, including empty nesters
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Statistically speaking, you and your wife would probably lead happier lives without children.
 
Alas, Maister do I dare launch into a commentary on priorities, consumerism, keeping up with the Joneses, priorities and personal responsibilty in a vain attempt to counter your topic?

;)

Not that I know, having no kids.


However, I did think about this last night. According to many Myers-Briggs Tests I have taken, I test as a personality type INFP. We INFPs tend to seek perfection in people but also think that such perfection must be acheived (read: we're too shy to ask of it from those around us). Part of my frustrations with the dogs are when they do not act perfectly, I get mighty frustrated. I am scared of this with children as well. This INFP stuff is interesting to read because it does say a lot about my personality, but also it is easy to hide behind it, using it as an excuse.

More stuff to sort out, but I have some time before kids come along.
 
Those are some interesting studies, Maister. Still, I wonder about some of the details of the study. Did they track parents over time? You never stop being a parent once you have kids and your view on "happiness" from 50 and having grown children may be different from having a 5 and 3 year old running around the house.

And is "happiness" really the issue here? Would it have been different if they asked respondents if they felt "fulfilled"? or something else more nuanced - satisfied, gratified?

Yes, children are hard work and I might be "happier" (or really, just less stressed, which is not necessarily the same thing) on a daily basis if I did not have them. But is that the same as being "gratified"? For example, I feel a much deeper purpose in life with children than without (and I'm not saying those without have no purpose - just how it makes me feel). I feel like I am giving something to the larger world - stewarding another generation into adulthood, continuing the race, hopefully making it an improved place.

Also, I wonder about questions of "joy" as compared to "happiness." The level and intensity of joy I get from my kids exceeds anything I experienced before. Which is not the same as saying I am "happy" on a day-to-day basis. The joy comes in spurts. Maybe it is made even sweeter by the struggles, I don't know.

Sorry to rant. I realize you did not conduct the study or even think its results mean we shouldn't have kids. I just sometimes get frustrated with the conception that being personally "happy" on a regular basis is really the golden chalice we should be chasing as a society. Isn't there more to life than that?
 
wahday said:
I just sometimes get frustrated with the conception that being personally "happy" on a regular basis is really the golden chalice we should be chasing as a society. Isn't there more to life than that?
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Yeah, only one Cyburbian 'fessed up to that on the highly scientific sociological study conducted on Cyburbia last year. According to the highly-regarded Cyburbian study we should be chasing other people's happiness as a society (that, or we should be chasing 42, but interpretation of the data is ongoing).

Now that ofos has been shown a real example of sociology at work, I bet he feels real bad for implying these sorts of studies are useless!

Wait a minute...am I on the right thread? Oh wait, here it is.
 
Well We Did It

We have reached a milestone - a passage of rite if you will - in parenting. Last week while vacation back home in Florida, we took Wee P to the Magic Kingdom at WWD for the day. We didn't tell her where she was going and let her figure it out. It was great to seeing that little mind working as she saw different things driving to the gate and then hearing annoucements and other kids talking. Then it clicked and her face lit up.

She did very well, but whined about a buying things a couple times (when the rides dump you out into the store to exit). Over all pretty good for a 5 year old in August heat.

And for her parents, well I need the t-shirt that says "We survived the Disney World Death March 2008"
 
I take my oldest daughter to NC for her first semester at college this weekend. I don't know how I'll be able to drive away. I watched her leave for school everyday for 13 years, and soon she'll be on her own. I thought that she would always be five years old....
 
First semester away at college, Wow that is quite the milestone! Is she excited much?

But you've just injected fear into me! wah:-c;):-D
 
She's excited and anxious, thanks for asking. She is the only girl-child here, and has been in her own room, so sharing a room with a stranger, let alone a stranger from Kenya, has her a little worried.

A guy I know at work told me that when it's time to leave NC, to drive 50 miles before stopping. I am a litlle afraid that I'll lurk around campus until I'm sure she's OK. It'll be tough to go.

I don't think that there's any way to prepare for this. :-c
 
My oldest daughter started kindergarten this week (yes, I feel old, especially after just celebrating my 30th b-day in June:-|) and her and her little sister also started at a new home-based day care.

The week went very well, although they've both spent time in all-day day care centers before, so they're used to it. My daughters are awesome and quite adaptable!!!

I hope my kindergartener doesn't get bored. She already knows how to read and do basic addition and subtraction. I'm sure the teachers will keep her busy though.

I'm just a really happy Dad this week! Time for some :b::b:
 
btrage said:
My oldest daughter started kindergarten this week (yes, I feel old, especially after just celebrating my 30th b-day in June:-|) and her and her little sister also started at a new home-based day care.

The week went very well, although they've both spent time in all-day day care centers before, so they're used to it. My daughters are awesome and quite adaptable!!!

I hope my kindergartener doesn't get bored. She already knows how to read and do basic addition and subtraction. I'm sure the teachers will keep her busy though.

I'm just a really happy Dad this week! Time for some :b::b:
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Right there with ya btrage. Our daugther started kindergarten last week too and absolutly loves it. Proud to be a parent too.
 
btrage said:
My oldest daughter started kindergarten this week (yes, I feel old, especially after just celebrating my 30th b-day in June:-|) and her and her little sister also started at a new home-based day care.
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Cheers! My youngest is 3 (goes to a pre-school half day) Oldest is 8. And I just celebrated my 40th!! in July:-c

They both love school and, frankly, the wife and I are glad for some structure at this point.

Enjoy it while you can, whippersnapper, and buy me a round, too!:D
 
Not a good day for me as a parent. Last night I was preparing for a speech contest and was stressed. My son was struggling with his second grade reading assignment and was frustrated and uncooperative. I flew off the handle (which I rarely ever do with him) and yelled at him.

He said, "You are scaring me, Papa"

I felt like s**t. :-$
 
put another quarter in the therapy fund, otterpop...

we have a therapy fund for our kids - it gets quarters a couple times a week, our teenager's fund is huge, some therapist will have a nice Hinkley yacht someday because of her - sometimes these things happen - the time to be nervous is when it happens and you don't even realize it or don't care

you are a good parent - don't worry - :)
 
wahday said:
Enjoy it while you can, whippersnapper, and buy me a round, too!:D
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I got married and started family sort of early. Sometimes I feel like I'm 40! But I'll be a young empty-nester (I hope)!

otterpop said:
Not a good day for me as a parent. Last night I was preparing for a speech contest and was stressed. My son was struggling with his second grade reading assignment and was frustrated and uncooperative. I flew off the handle (which I rarely ever do with him) and yelled at him.

He said, "You are scaring me, Papa"

I felt like s**t. :-$
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I think all parents have been there multiple times. It's how we learn from it that matters. And I can't imagine that occasionally flying off the handle will permanently scar our children.
 
Suggestions on helping my son with his reading

My son is in second grade. His math skills are first-rate. He has been getting great grades on his spelling tests too. He is a smart kid. But he is struggling with getting his reading skills up. Most of the other kids in his class are ahead of him in fluency. He struggles with reading, so it is hard to get him to practice his reading. Though I am certainly not an expert on the matter, I do not believe it is dyslexia. No one at his school has mentioned this possibility.

So, have any of you parents had a similar problem with a kid who is having trouble reading? I would appreciate any suggestions you might have. I feel that he is close to turning the corner on this problem. Maybe something one of you has experienced or done is a solution I haven't thought of yet.
 
otterpop said:
My son is in second grade. His math skills are first-rate. He has been getting great grades on his spelling tests too. He is a smart kid. But he is struggling with getting his reading skills up. Most of the other kids in his class are ahead of him in fluency. He struggles with reading, so it is hard to get him to practice his reading. Though I am certainly not an expert on the matter, I do not believe it is dyslexia. No one at his school has mentioned this possibility.

So, have any of you parents had a similar problem with a kid who is having trouble reading? I would appreciate any suggestions you might have. I feel that he is close to turning the corner on this problem. Maybe something one of you has experienced or done is a solution I haven't thought of yet.
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  • Get him a library card (his very own!) and let him select books.
  • Gold stars for getting through books?
  • Does he see you and mom reading? Role modeling is important.
  • Series books (Little House-type) can be persuasive. What happens next? Remember in the last book, Laura and Mary walked to school in the snow and won the spelling bee? (L.I. Wilder had excellent continuity.)

Persuading a kid to read has never been an issue in my family (origin). When I took my 1-1/2 yo niece to see the Easter Bunny, she took a book along, as though it was a doll.

HTH
 
Veloise makes great suggestions to try and ramp up the motivation factor. I have a friend whose son is in Kumon, he started when he fell behind but is still attending because he likes it, so now he is ahead.
 
otterpop said:
My son is in second grade. His math skills are first-rate. He has been getting great grades on his spelling tests too. He is a smart kid. But he is struggling with getting his reading skills up. Most of the other kids in his class are ahead of him in fluency. He struggles with reading, so it is hard to get him to practice his reading. Though I am certainly not an expert on the matter, I do not believe it is dyslexia. No one at his school has mentioned this possibility.

So, have any of you parents had a similar problem with a kid who is having trouble reading? I would appreciate any suggestions you might have. I feel that he is close to turning the corner on this problem. Maybe something one of you has experienced or done is a solution I haven't thought of yet.
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Try to find books in an area of interest to him: transportation, dinosaurs, etc.

Or find books with some dialogue and you read one voice, he reads the other. Make it "dramatic". Or have him read along to books on CD or tape.

Ask him to "read to me" instructions for something simple, like frying eggs. He'll feel helpful and less stressed if it's a non-scholastic thing to do.

Talk about "new words" you have heard and what they mean.

Veloise's suggestion is excellent; reading a series and waiting for the next book can be really exciting for a kid. My kid went nuts over the Magic Treehouse series.

There is always the chance that your son is actually very advanced and bored with what he's reading in school, and tunes it out. You may have to challenge him. Start with a dialogue about some more advanced subjects and see if he is interested, then indulge him.
 
Veloise said:
  • Get him a library card (his very own!) and let him select books.
  • Gold stars for getting through books?
  • Does he see you and mom reading? Role modeling is important.
  • Series books (Little House-type) can be persuasive. What happens next? Remember in the last book, Laura and Mary walked to school in the snow and won the spelling bee? (L.I. Wilder had excellent continuity.)

Persuading a kid to read has never been an issue in my family (origin). When I took my 1-1/2 yo niece to see the Easter Bunny, she took a book along, as though it was a doll.

HTH
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My kids loved the Dr. Suess easy to read books. Helped their reading a lot and they felt accomplished to be able to read whole books.
 
I was done for the night, but I thought up some more ideas. (This is what I do with unused brain cells: think about how other people raise their kids.)
  • Read to him, a bedtime story, a chapter every night. As ZG suggested, trade lines; he reads one, you the next.
  • Storytime at the library? (Got that from the comics. Luann dresses in costumes to read to kids.)
  • Get him interested in the newspaper comics.
  • Do you share a hobby? Bet there's a magazine about it. When I took my nieces on the GOBA bike tour, I had them reading Bicycling.
  • If you are raising him bi-lingual, get into the Letters to Abuelita mode. Likewise, get some books or other materials written in Spanish. (I have fond memories of Selectiones de Reader's Digest.)
  • Six is early for Harry Potter, no? When those books were being released, my sis would get three copies for Christmas, so there was minimal fighting, complaining, "she's reading faster than meee!" stuff.
 
Zoning Goddess said:
There is always the chance that your son is actually very advanced and bored with what he's reading in school, and tunes it out. You may have to challenge him. Start with a dialogue about some more advanced subjects and see if he is interested, then indulge him.
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I think that has a lot to do with it. He is interested in astronomy, all kinds of science and dinosaurs (okay, all boys are interested in dinosaurs). He wants to jump into things that interest him, without spending time building on the reading skills he needs to read books that would challenge his quest for knowledge. However, the information in books at his reading level contains stuff he knew about long ago. Last night we were discussing the Paleozoic, Mesozoic and Cenozoic eras.

Last night there was a stroke of luck. The local Papa Murphy's gave the kids at his school a bookmark with ten empty boxes on it. Every time a kid finishes a book, their teacher can initial one box. After the ten boxes are signed, the kid can have one mini-pizza. My son was pretty excited about the prospect of a free pizza. We talked about it and I told him if he applied himself he could probably win that pizza by Christmas. I am thinking this might be one of the answers - set a goal of a certain number of books read and a reward at the end (pizza, trip to the arcade, etc.)

Thanks everyone for the suggestions so far and keep them coming. :)

RJ, I like your suggestion, too. My wife is taking English classes at the library. Maybe this could help her (and me)
 
otterpop said:
I think that has a lot to do with it. He is interested in astronomy, all kinds of science and dinosaurs (okay, all boys are interested in dinosaurs). He wants to jump into things that interest him, without spending time building on the reading skills he needs to read books that would challenge his quest for knowledge. However, the information in books at his reading level contains stuff he knew about long ago. Last night we were discussing the Paleozoic, Mesozoic and Cenozoic eras.
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My soon-to-be 4 yo nephew has the dinosaur bug so last weekend I was at Barnes & Noble looking at dinosaur books. As I'm sure you know, there are a ton out there on all different aspect of dinos. I got my nephew an encyclopedia of dinosaurs figuring he could read it now with help from Mom & Dad and grow into reading it on his own. I liked it because it was little snippets of info rather than sagas. There was also this neat book that slowly dissected a T-rex in layers. So as you turn the page you can see what a T-rex's circulatory system looked like, what the skeleton looked like, etc.

Have you thought about writing stories with him? My mom used to help me "publish" newspapers. This helped me get interested in words.
 
Potty-Training

So my 5 year old daughter was a breeze to potty train. She had it down before she turned 3.

My 2 1/2 year old daughter is probably about 50% there. She wears regular underwear throughout the day, except for a pull-up during nap and bedtime, or for certain events like taking her to a professional sporting event where it's a hassle to get to the bathroom. She does have accidents occassionaly, but she is still 2 1/2.

On to my issue...........the girl just refuses to poop in the toilet or potty chair thingy. Nothing I or my wife try can get her to go. I'm thinking that if she just does it one time, then it will be mostly downhill from there. The funny part is sometimes I ask her if she's "scared of the poo poo". And she gets this really serious look on her face, and nods her head yes.

We've tried many things, but she will just not go until she has a pull-up on during nap/bedtime.

How do I make her not "afraid of the poo poo" :-D
 
btrage said:
How do I make her not "afraid of the poo poo" :-D
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That is the question, isn't it? We have a 3 year old (as of last week, and she just started this about 2 or three months ago. Very similar situation. She was ok with peeing and had been going in the potty on and off for 5-6 months. But #2 seems to be another story altogether. When she had to go, she would insist on putting on a diaper.

I don't know what to tell you about how it all switched. It sort of happened without our noticing it seems. It is true that she was afraid of falling into the potty and that m,ay have been part of it, but again, she was ok with pee, but not poo.

In general, the less you think and talk about it with her, the more likely she is to take the initiative on her own, I think (now that she knows what she needs to go).

Like my wife likes to say about stuff like this: "I don't know anyone who went to college still pooing in a diaper." 2.5 is still a fine age to be wrestling with this stuff. I wouldn't fret about it too much...
 
btrage said:
Sorry, maybe I'm a little slow today. Care to explain?
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Cute adorable fuzzy-wuzzy kitty poops in the box. See, that's how it's done. If baby kitty can do it, so can baby human.

It's a thought, anyway. And it sure works in reverse in my household; I enter the throne room, and instantly have company headed to their litter trays.
 
Veloise said:
Cute adorable fuzzy-wuzzy kitty poops in the box. See, that's how it's done. If baby kitty can do it, so can baby human.

It's a thought, anyway. And it sure works in reverse in my household; I enter the throne room, and instantly have company headed to their litter trays.
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Gotcha. Interesting thought, and could go over well with little girls. Except mean old dad doesn't like cats.

Now if I could just train my 80 lbs. dog to use the toilet...............:-D
 
wahday said:
That is the question, isn't it? We have a 3 year old (as of last week, and she just started this about 2 or three months ago. Very similar situation. She was ok with peeing and had been going in the potty on and off for 5-6 months. But #2 seems to be another story altogether. When she had to go, she would insist on putting on a diaper.

I don't know what to tell you about how it all switched. It sort of happened without our noticing it seems. It is true that she was afraid of falling into the potty and that m,ay have been part of it, but again, she was ok with pee, but not poo.

In general, the less you think and talk about it with her, the more likely she is to take the initiative on her own, I think (now that she knows what she needs to go).

Like my wife likes to say about stuff like this: "I don't know anyone who went to college still pooing in a diaper." 2.5 is still a fine age to be wrestling with this stuff. I wouldn't fret about it too much...
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This was similar to my experience with the now Resident Teenager. She categorically refused to poop in the potty and would bring you a diaper when she wanted to do that. It seems that she didn't like the sound that it made hitting the water or the potential of getting splashed more than anything (she's weird like that still). My mom and I just used to let her be in the bathroom with us so she would see it wasn't a big deal and also when she started going to nursery school a couple of days a week she would see other kids doing their entire business in the potty. She got there on her own by 3.
 
I too have this problem with my daughter. She was on track to going on the potty and she got the pee pee thing down, but now can't seem to do either. We have tried everything from candy rewards, stickers, songs, nothing. We have even tried putting on her underwear, spankings, discipline, potty watch, and nothing. She still refuses to go in the toilet. Her mother and I are at our wits end with getting her to go in the potty and the bad part is, she knows how. Any ideas?
 
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