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Humor 😜 The 1914 Grand National Convention of the American Institute of State, County, Parish, City, Town, Village, and Borough Plannerists

Dan

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The 1914 Grand National Convention of the American Institute of State, County, Parish, City, Town, Village, and Borough Physical Plannerists (AISCPCTVBPP) was the first ever meeting of those that practiced the then-new profession of state, county, parish, city, town, village, and borough physical planning.

I found a record of the conference proceedings while doing some research at a nearby library. I thought you might enjoy the scans I made of some of the photos in the proceedings.

The first Grand National Convention was held in "The City of To-Morrow, A Most Perfectly and Precisely Surveyed and Settled Collection of Inhabitants, Residents, Manufactories, and Shops, With No Rival in the Past and No Equal in the Future, Steubenville, Ohio". At the time, plannerists thought Steubenville would "surely have a population that shames and expectorates copious amounts of Battle-Ax spittle upon the cow-town of Kansas City, the hog-town of Chicago, the bean-town of Boston, and the choo-choo-town of Altoona in 10 years, if not sooner."

Old timey planning conference 00003.jpg


The Steubenville German-American Industrial Bank building, "The Finest Erection in the Entire Ohio River Valley". In a couple of years, it would be renamed to the "First All-American Red, White, and Blue Bank and Trust"

Conference sessions were very well attended. The session below was titled "Effective Means to Introduce Even More Gravitas and Extravagance to Your Writing".

Old timey planning conference 00002.jpg


The session attracting the largest crowd was "Safe and Sanitary Place-ment and Regulation of Brothels, Bordellos, Cat-houses, Call-houses, Bawdy-houses, Disorderly-houses, Houses of Ill Repute, Sporting-houses, Houses of Assignation, Dens of Iniquity, and Whore-houses; and the Ladies of the Evening, Courtesans, Prostitutes, Tramps, Coquettes, Harlots, Libertines, Felatelists, Tarts, Bawdy-dancers, Minxes, Away-wives, Hire-lings, Daughters of Joy, and Rhode Island Wet Nurses Contained and Working Therein." The madam from the largest brothel in Providence was at the session to describe in exacting detail all the possible kinds of activities that could take place with such a use.

Old timey planning conference 00005.jpg


Many signed up for the "Ambulatory Work-Shops", to see examples of current best planning practices in action. The following photos were from a tour called "Making Most Active the Frontages of Streets, Avenues, Boulevards, Roads, Park-ways, Drives, Circles, and Other Traveled Ways to Enliven and Delight Both Normal Pedestrians and Women."

Old timey planning conference 00016.jpg


old-timey-planning-conference-00014.jpg


Old timey planning conference 00011.jpg


At the time, cities were struggling with the concept of "city swine." Their defenders said city swine reduces the amount of waste that would normally be dumped in creeks and rivers, and "provide an inexpensive and generous source of bacon for the gentle-man of modest means, if he has patience."

Old timey planning conference 00015.jpg


Old timey planning conference 00012.jpg


The plannerists attending the "Place-ment of Sites for Fine Industry" were disappointed at the lack of smoke. "My eight year old daughter exhales more smoke from her lunch-cigars", said noted plannerist Harlan Bartholemew.

Old timey planning conference 00014.jpg


There was much admiration for the orphan-powered transit system that ran up and down the steep slopes of the city. The life expectancy of an orphancar "motor" was eight years, so the system did indeed "keep children out of trouble", as promised when the concept was first proposed.

Old timey planning conference 00010.jpg


These plannerists approved of the concept of a "play-ground". This is the Old Potato-Town Play-Ground, about a mile west of downtown Steubenville.

Old timey planning conference 00007.jpg


This group of plannerists were impressed with Steubenville's clean, orderly streets and storefronts.

Old-timey-planning-conference-00004.jpg


They were more critical of the experimental Enclosed Electro-Petro-Motive Carriage. "An abject failure. It will make men weak to not embrace the open air to turn a crank, saddle a stallion, or drop a token into the open mouth of a streetcar conductor", said legendary landscape architect Frederick Law Olmsted.

Old timey planning conference 00001.jpg


Then, as now, the exhibit hall was a popular gathering spot to score some swag, and maybe a new job.

Old timey planning conference 00008.jpg


Old timey planning conference 00017.jpg


Old timey planning conference 00009.jpg


Also, just like conferences up until the COVID pandemic, everybody looked forward to the reception, and its open bar.

Old timey planning conference 00006.jpg
 
Also, they have some odd pig-sheep hybrids back then. They must have gone extinct with the loss of so much factory soot.
 
I found some more photos from the "Making Most Active the Frontages of Streets, Avenues, Boulevards, Roads, Park-ways, Drives, Circles, and Other Traveled Ways to Enliven and Delight Both Normal Pedestrians and Women" Ambulatory Work-Shop.

A kitten. I can't see why this would have been such an attraction back then.

Old timey planning conference 00025.jpg


A couple of street vendors. This one is selling "Fresh Pennsylvania Infants".

Old timey planning conference 00024.jpg


Anybody know what "pium" is?

Old timey planning conference 00021.jpg


A public spittoon. When one plannerist asked a public official "Do you fear that some imbecile will relieve himself or herself in the trough?", the response was "It would take an even bigger imbecile to take a drink out of it!" Another official added "Or someone from Mingo Junction!", after which everybody laughed.

Old timey planning conference 00022.jpg


This was "The One True and Genuine Pit to Dante's Very Own Inferno, The Bowels of the Earth, The Eternal Fires of Hell." Parents in the area would warn misbehaving children "If you don't stop acting up, I'm going to throw you down Dante's Hole." I did a bit of research, and found the hole remained a popular local attraction through the years, until it was sealed in 1974. "Through the years, only 220 children and 37 adults lost their lives, and possibly their souls as well, to the Hole."

Old timey planning conference 00020.jpg
 
The 1914 Grand National Convention of the American Institute of State, County, Parish, City, Town, Village, and Borough Physical Plannerists (AISCPCTVBPP) was the first ever meeting of those that practiced the then-new profession of state, county, parish, city, town, village, and borough physical planning.

I found a record of the conference proceedings while doing some research at a nearby library. I thought you might enjoy the scans I made of some of the photos in the proceedings.

The first Grand National Convention was held in "The City of To-Morrow, A Most Perfectly and Precisely Surveyed and Settled Collection of Inhabitants, Residents, Manufactories, and Shops, With No Rival in the Past and No Equal in the Future, Steubenville, Ohio". At the time, plannerists thought Steubenville would "surely have a population that shames and expectorates copious amounts of Battle-Ax spittle upon the cow-town of Kansas City, the hog-town of Chicago, the bean-town of Boston, and the choo-choo-town of Altoona in 10 years, if not sooner."

View attachment 64453

The Steubenville German-American Industrial Bank building, "The Finest Erection in the Entire Ohio River Valley". In a couple of years, it would be renamed to the "First All-American Red, White, and Blue Bank and Trust"

Conference sessions were very well attended. The session below was titled "Effective Means to Introduce Even More Gravitas and Extravagance to Your Writing".

View attachment 64454

The session attracting the largest crowd was "Safe and Sanitary Place-ment and Regulation of Brothels, Bordellos, Cat-houses, Call-houses, Bawdy-houses, Disorderly-houses, Houses of Ill Repute, Sporting-houses, Houses of Assignation, Dens of Iniquity, and Whore-houses; and the Ladies of the Evening, Courtesans, Prostitutes, Tramps, Coquettes, Harlots, Libertines, Felatelists, Tarts, Bawdy-dancers, Minxes, Away-wives, Hire-lings, Daughters of Joy, and Rhode Island Wet Nurses Contained and Working Therein." The madam from the largest brothel in Providence was at the session to describe in exacting detail all the possible kinds of activities that could take place with such a use.

View attachment 64455

Many signed up for the "Ambulatory Work-Shops", to see examples of current best planning practices in action. The following photos were from a tour called "Making Most Active the Frontages of Streets, Avenues, Boulevards, Roads, Park-ways, Drives, Circles, and Other Traveled Ways to Enliven and Delight Both Normal Pedestrians and Women."

View attachment 64456

View attachment 64471

View attachment 64458

At the time, cities were struggling with the concept of "city swine." Their defenders said city swine reduces the amount of waste that would normally be dumped in creeks and rivers, and "provide an inexpensive and generous source of bacon for the gentle-man of modest means, if he has patience."

View attachment 64460

View attachment 64459

The plannerists attending the "Place-ment of Sites for Fine Industry" were disappointed at the lack of smoke. "My eight year old daughter exhales more smoke from her lunch-cigars", said noted plannerist Harlan Bartholemew.

View attachment 64461

There was much admiration for the orphan-powered transit system that ran up and down the steep slopes of the city. The life expectancy of an orphancar "motor" was eight years, so the system did indeed "keep children out of trouble", as promised when the concept was first proposed.

View attachment 64464

These plannerists approved of the concept of a "play-ground". This is the Old Potato-Town Play-Ground, about a mile west of downtown Steubenville.

View attachment 64463

This group of plannerists were impressed with Steubenville's clean, orderly streets and storefronts.

View attachment 64472

They were more critical of the experimental Enclosed Electro-Petro-Motive Carriage. "An abject failure. It will make men weak to not embrace the open air to turn a crank, saddle a stallion, or drop a token into the open mouth of a streetcar conductor", said legendary landscape architect Frederick Law Olmsted.

View attachment 64469

Then, as now, the exhibit hall was a popular gathering spot to score some swag, and maybe a new job.

View attachment 64465

View attachment 64467

View attachment 64466

Also, just like conferences up until the COVID pandemic, everybody looked forward to the reception, and its open bar.

View attachment 64468
Post of the DECADE!

Incidentally, it should be spelled "street-car". Don't forget that all-important hyphen.
 
Anybody know what "pium" is?

View attachment 64484
Yes, pium push-carts were frequently found next to ocaine push-carts down-town. Entrepreneurial sellers could often make nearly a dollar a day selling the healthful elixirs on street-corners. Both were effective treatments for ailments such as ague, cancer, lumbago, the struts, and Chester Arthur's Disease.
 
I can't help but wonder what life must have been like for the previous two-years for the local Steubenville plannerists, no doubt working long, grueling and thank-less hours in preparation for the 1914 Grand National Convention. Poor souls.
 
Yes, pium push-carts were frequently found next to ocaine push-carts down-town. Entrepreneurial sellers could often make nearly a dollar a day selling the healthful elixirs on street-corners. Both were effective treatments for ailments such as ague, cancer, lumbago, the struts, and Chester Arthur's Disease.
There were also these cures for whatever ails you, from the Discomfort to Ottoman Wasting.

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old-timey-planning-conference-51.jpg


old-timey-planning-conference-54.jpg


GNCAISCPCTVBP 1 also had the first ever working demonstration of GIS, It didn't really catch on for another 70 to 75 years, for some reason.

old-timey-gis.jpg
 
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